I have been thinking about money this weekend. (Celebrating Independence Day was also on my mind, and I hope you all had a great 4th of July celebration.) But after reading about the “Envelope System” at Organizing Your Way and Small Notebooks’ articles about her “No-Spending-Month” I got to thinking about my spending habits and my family’s financial security.
I have never needed to adhere to a strict budget. I have always had a bit of debt, a bit of savings, and made my 401K contributions first. I had always been able to find employment that paid the bills and have an excellent credit score to prove it. But I have never saved toward a goal. And, I have never been debt free. This weekend I realized that I had been living one financial philosophy and that I could choose to live an alternative financial philosophy and work toward a future of debt-free financial security.
A Change of Perspective and Changing Priorities
I am making a decision to change my perspective about spending money. Until now, I spent money in purchases I needed, or thought I deserved (or thought I “needed”). I wanted that expensive artisan cheese, and if I had the cash, I’d buy it. I’d enjoy it, but I wasn’t looking toward a long-term horizon. I realized that I can make a debt-free future a reality if I make it a priority. That means not purchasing the cheese I want even if I do have the cash, because I could use that money to secure a better future for my family. I have never considered a debt-free future when purchasing cheese. Such a large goal seemed so abstract and unattainable. But after some quick calculations this weekend, I realized we could pay down all our credit card debt, and our entire 2nd mortgage in 4 years.
I spoke with my husband this weekend about choosing to make a debt-free financial goal a priority for our family. We agreed we want the financial freedom to send our children to college and study abroad. We want to retire owning our home. And we agree that we are spiritually whole and that we don’t have to be “materially whole.” Now, with a defined goal in mind we are choosing to be aware of our needs versus our wants, or what we think we deserve, to have to be able to attain that debt-free future.
Changing Fiscial Philosophies
I have been living for external approval instead of internal approval of my financial success. Having the latest TV technology, the most expensive car, or living in the fanciest home garners external approval of your financial success. Being debt-free isn’t something others can see. And pulling back on the number of flashy possessions you own can seem to some that you are financially unsuccessful. I have decided to “not care about what others think” of my possessions. My husband and I decided to work toward a debt-free future even if others disapprove and we are sticking to it to give our children a financially secure future.
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Okay, you out there who have been walking your path to a secure financial future are probably like, “yeah, she gets it!” And, those who always thought like I did, are probably like, “wow, interesting.” I am glad that I made the switch, and that am now making a debt-free future a priority for my family. It still seems like an insurmountable goal with grad-school loans and a mortgage, but it will only happen if WE MAKE IT HAPPEN. Wish us luck. Happy Organizing.
I love what you wrote about being spiritually whole and that you don’t have to be “materially whole.” And congrats on reducing your spending by 50%!
Gina, I never thought about this change of attitude before…but I am glad that it hit me upside the head now instead of later! Thanks for your well wishes.
Yes, I’m chiming in with a “Yeah, she gets it!” but I also think it’s great that you and hubby are both on the same page. We weren’t for many years, but now we actually sit down 1-2 times per month and go over where our discretionary money is, we set a budget for the whole year (incl. vacations), and we’re working towards our goal of paying off the mortgage early.
I think it’s a good attitude you’re adopting about not needing the latest-and-greatest. You’ll be tested on that as your kids hit the tweens and teens (I’m already getting it a little with a 5yo). Good luck!
Thank you Abbie. His biggest problem is change. He doesn’t deal with change well. So having him make that big step is the worst part! Thanks again!
Chele, you know, I never thought about my husband being on-board with this debt-reduction idea as a blessing to be had. I just assumed that he would be. I control most of the day-to-day finances, and he directs our long-term investment portfolio…just happend to be what we were both interested in in business school.
But I guess it is wonderful to be on the same page with regard to our finances. I am keeping you and your husband in my prayers that you are able to find a goal you can both work toward. Money is a very tricky subject in many marriages. And having different ideas of wants, needs, and deserve-to-haves is very challenging. I wish you the very best as you continue this journey with your husband. 
Abbie
I will have you in my thoughts and prayers… I want the same thing but it’s not easy talking to the husband about this. I need to just do it but I am afraid of the 101 questions he’ll have and I won’t have an answer for YET! It’s something I have been working towards. The only thing we ever argue about is money so it is going to take some work to get him to the point I am! I’m glad your husband had such an open mind about it!